Rollercoaster 

Last night, Hubby and I were grocery shopping. With Mother’s Day over, the next big push greeting card wise is for Father’s Day. I don’t know if it’s a blessing or a curse or even just part of the process but when I think of Dads, I don’t immediately remember that mine is gone. The silent mental interaction went something like this: 

“Oh. I should get a Father’s Day card early.” Routine.

“No. Dad is gone. I will never buy another Father’s Day card.” Grief. 

“Well, unless I buy them for Hubby” Random glimmer of hope.

Emotional beach volleyball in fewer than 5 seconds. I do have to say I was proud of my lack of pessimistic self-judgment for daring to let the hope win the match. 

I definitely credit my newfound peace of mind from my Mind-Body group and nightly relaxation experience. It is changing me in ways I never could have imagined. I’m not sure I could/would consider resuming treatment without it. Part of me would consider naming my firstborn after its creator.  Hubby and I had a six hour couples retreat today where we did partner yoga and massage, did a listening exercise, and learned about the “Joy of Stress”. 

Now, hopefully I have stockpiled coping skills to take me through the rollercoaster of another cycle and any other challenge that may come my way. 

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